The Gist

Bob Allen: I had to give a blow job to save my life

We've heard just about everything from right-wing hypocrite closet cases when they've been caught(from outright denials, a la Haggard, to Mark "I was an abused child" Foley) but Florida Rep. Bob Allen takes the cake: He says he just had to proposition an undercover cop in order to save himself from threatening black men lurking all over the park!

It's not a surprise that a self-loathing homophobe is a racist too, but what is hilarious about this wacked-out story is that he seems to be arguing that the police do in fact entrap people in sting operations. And this is the guy who tried to pass a law banning masturbation in front of any other person in public. Totally, undeniably, unbelievability insane.